The Adequate Blog

I’ve talked about the necessity of having a sign if you’re a stage act - it identifies you as, yes, an actual show, and gives your show an air of “legitimacy” (oh look he’s someone who’s performing and not some random weirdo who walked out onto the stage).

I’d like to talk about another form of signage which I don’t see too often at the short-run faires, or in fact the long-run faires either - the Advertisement.

With a short-run faire, everything goes up and comes down in a weekend. You have one and only one chance to make your potential audience aware that you have a show in the next few minutes. For most of us, this involves doing a lot of hawking - but that shouting can blend in easily to the background noise of Fare - it is a shouty place, after all.

A few years back, I decided to take some of the marketing for magicians stuff I spent a stupid amount of money on (long story) and make up signs for myself, advertising my show.   Nothing really fancy - five minutes in PowerPoint generated a simple 8.5″ x 11″ landscape format sign with my logo, the show’s name, Tobias the Adequate, and the tagline “Dangerous and More Than a Little Stupid” along with the warning “Three shows daily” and a space for the location and times for the shows.

I’ll print up a batch of these on a fairly neutral colored heavy card stock and pack them along with some thumb tacks or a staple gun, and when I get onto site and learn where and when I’m performing, I scribble that information onto the signs and then walk the site tacking them to posts and trees and the like. There. Now I have ten to twelve additional indications that I’ll be performing, along with where and when.

Some guidelines:

• Some sites don’t want you tacking signs to their trees.  Make sure you check so you don’t end up breaking this rule.
• If you’ve made nice with some of the vendors (see previous blog post), you may be able to tack a sign up on one of their posts or uprights. This has the added benefit that said vendor may well talk you up to their customers.
• You don’t have to splash out for seriously Ye Olde Parchmente style paper for these signs. Neutrals - tan, light brown, khaki - will work fine.
• Print a few more signs than you think you’ll use. Because you’ll wind up using them too.

Go forth and promote!

Whenever possible, get on site early.  I’ve said this before, but this time for a diffferent reason - in this case, it will give you a chance to get at least a passing acquaintance with the vendors.

Why do that?

For one thing, it helps to establish you as a participant rather than a “playtron” (that is, a patron who gets dressed up), which can save some confusion and bother later as it’s less likely you’ll be hawked to. It’s good ettiquite for vendors to tone down or skip the hawking when it comes to folks who actually perform at Faire. 

It can also give you a chance to get to know who you can come to to “sell singles” - if you’re a pass-the-hat act, you’re going to get a lot of one dollar bills. Most vendors start out with a “bank” of twenties, tens, fives and ones, but through the day customers will pay for things with twenties because that’s what comes out of the ATM. So, if you show up with a nice stack of singles, especially near the aftenoon part of the event, you can make some points with vendors by “cashing up” and trading a stack or two of singles for twenty dollar bills. 

… and that can make life easier for all involved.

A stage show at Faire has to contend with a lot of distractions during the show - especially if your stage is right in the middle of everything.  The biggest interruptions tend to be from parades.

Ah, parades. When some group or other moves en masse from one part of Faire to another - sometimes to do their own show, sometimes as the “local color” for the event, and sometimes… well… sometimes Her Majesty just wants to go “Walkies”… and The Queen Does Not Go Walkies Alone.

Having a large group of people move noisily through or just behind your audience area can be death for a pass-the-hat show. It interrupts the “flow” of the event, and if it happens at the wrong time… it can kill your “hat line”, causing the entire crowd to turn their backs to you to see what all that ruckus is about.

This isn’t a complaint, this is a simple fact of how these events work.  And there’s some times that you, as a performer, can do to help minimize the damage, or even turn the interruptions to your advantage.

• Get to know your timetables - if the event actually schedules their parades and progresses, get a copy of that schedule and compare it to your show times. This will give you some idea as to when the interruptions are likely to occur, and help you plan
• Get to know the paraders - If this is the first time you’re performing at an event, you’re kind of on your own with that. However, if you can, get in touch with the folks who lead these parades.  If they know you as a person as opposed to Some Guy on Stage, they’re more likely to be willing to work with you.
• When you can, turn it into a bit - If you know they’re coming, you can work it into the show.  I have a loose arrangement with the criers wherein, if they’re taking a parade past my stage, I can call out a number and they’ll ring their bells in unison that many times.  Now imagine how your crowd might take you asking them for a number, then making the criers ring that many times.  Suddenly, the parade’s not an interruption, it’s part of the show.
• When you can’t. evaluate and be flexible - Let’s be honest here, Her Majesty the Queen may not care about your show, and she may not stop to watch. If that’s the case, being a good citizen of the Shire and leading *your* crowd in a few lusty cheers of “God Save the Queen” won’t hurt your standing with the management.
• Don’t take it personally - Honestly, there is no secret cabal plotting to ruin your show. The nature of RenFaire is that there are things happenning all around all the time. No one is working to “wreck” your show. As much as we’d all like everything else to stop dead while we’re performing, it’s not going to happen. Whenever possible, work with the interruptions and make them something other than interruptions. Make them part of your show.

As a part-time pro, I need to get out to perform at faires, perform, and then get back in time for my “day job”. For me, that means flying a lot. Fortunately, Southwest Airlines and I have an understanding - I pack everything I can into two bags and keep them under 50 lbs each, and they don’t charge me extra.

The challenge inherent in this situation is that I have to keep my show, costume, and assorted infrastructure to under 100 lbs total including luggage.

I’ve discussed the need for infrastructure before - a backstage area, a place to keep my stuff, and a way to contain that stuff in the somewhat uncontrolled environment of the Renaissance Faire. I’ve been working with using fabric drapes, poles, ropes and the like. Then, my better half and the sanest part of the organization, my wife, pointed something out to me while I was looking for tent poles at REI, a major outdoor adventure store an co-op.

There is a “Cabana” style tent designed for backpacking… something I can easily put a chair into, stretch out in to take a nap, and of course unload all my gear into to make a “backstage” area. The tent is a half-dome style, with about 52″ overhead clearance, so I can’t stand up in it but it’ll make for a safe place to change and so on.

The best part - this bad boy breaks down to a bundle a little taller than a roll of paper towels, and weighs less than five pounds. For someone who has to count every ounce when packing, this is great. And, with a little additional rip-stop nylon and muslin I can create a custom rain fly / “cover” and decorate it with my logo.

This tent isn’t cheap - It ran me a little over $100, but the lesson learned is to not be afraid to go out into the “real”, “modern” world to find your infrastructure. And, especially if space is an issue, take a tip from the hard-core outdoor adventurers and look for the stuff that packs down, but plays big.

• No one cares about who you used to be at Faire. They’re concerned with you are are now.
• Remember that weeks and sometimes entire months go by between weekends at Faire, and that during this time, something called “life” happens.
• Damp haybales don’t dry out if you’re sitting on them.
• Going to restaurants in costume begins  to pale after a decade
• If you can’t figure you who they’re yelling at to “make way” - it’s you
• When in doubt, if they’re well dressed they’re “my lord” or “my lady”, if they’re in peasant garb, they’re “good coz” if they’re customrs, go with “my lord” or “my lady” again.
• When in doubt among the nobles, gibber and grovel. Works wonders.
• It takes more skill to fail spectacularly than to succeed in a dull manner.
• Never underestimate the power of a well-timed spit-take

• The Video Camera Cyclops
• Don’t Know the Name but I Remember the Costume!
• The Missing Link (including Legend of Zelda sword, shield, hat, pointy ears…)
• Swarm of Disturbingly Well-Developed Underage Girls
• The Studly One - Everything’s studded! (Belt, wristbands, boots, tankard, eyebrow, nose…)
• Scottish Minimalism: Kilt. Sword. Boots. Whiskey.
• The Cluster of Mongers, All Shouting
• The Wench Walk
• The SCARY Wench Walk
• God Save The Queen! (aka: Bearded guy in Female Period Costume)
• The Man with the Comically Oversize Weapon
• Off-Duty Parade Person with Something On A Stick
• The Dark Knight (Full plate armor, bat symbol on chest, pointy ears on helm)
• Mister Patiently Waiting For His Wife To Come Out of the Dressmaker’s Booth
• Monty Python Monks (Iesu Domine *WHACK* Donna Aeis Requiem *WHACK*)

• No matter where you are, the Parade is always coming right at you.
• Dust. Water. They’re everywhere. Get used to it.
• If everyone around you is shouting, react silently. This will cause people to pay attention to  you.
• It’s not raining on you, it’s raining on everybody.
• You can attract more attention to yourself with a shortbread cookie than with a $300 costume (or massive cleavage).
• A “Faire Find” is someone else’s loss. How you handle this fact is entirely up to you.
• If you don’t take yourself seriously, you’ll be suprised at how many peope do.

…. moving away from Cheap Magic, let’s look at cheapness uh, frugality in Faire…

• Bring  most of your food and beverages with you - Yes, it meas you’re hauling more stuff onto site, but even bread, cheese and summer sausage bought “off site” will cost maybe 30% of what you’re going to pay for it at a food booth.
  You’ll notice I said “most” - it’s ok to budget yourself  few indulgences from the food and drink booths - but if you’re going to be frugal, make them indulgences and not Standard Operating Procedure.
• Look for non-faire sources for basics - I love our artisans and the wonderful things they make, but if you’re working on a budget, the basic pieces you use can come from anywhere, thrift stores, discount shops, hardware stores (nailer’s belt pouch: $10. Nuff said.).
• Plan on one”big” treat for yourself each Faire - This sets your own expectations and should help cut down on Sudden Impulse Purchase Syndrome.
  A corollary guideline is Look for little inexpensive gifts for Birthdays and Christmas at Faire.  Good artisans have little “Fin-catcher*” items available as well as their larger, more expensive goods.  And if you’re able to spend five or ten dollars on gifts for others over the course of a long-run faire, you’re also nailing down the Christmas Gift issue way early.

* “Fin-catcher” - An old vendor term for items which are of quality consistant with their more expensive wares, but only cost five dollars or so.

… If you’re going to be performing at Faires which offer compensation, you’re going to have to confront the “how much should I ask to be paid” question.

The best guideline I can give is to determine your Cost Plus Profit rate.

In this case, Cost is what it costs you to perform - this includes

• Travel Costs (airfare? gas? car rental)
• Lodging (hotel? camper? tent? crash space at a friend
• Food and Living Expenses

When calculating your rate, think about how much is costs to get you there, and back, in one piece. Once you’ve got an idea of what your average is, double it so that  you have a 50/50 ratio of Cost Plus Profit.

This may not be your best rate, but it’s a good place to start.  There may be gigs which cost more, and gigs which cost less, but if you have a solid base rate and are willing to negotiate for options to mitigate costs such as passing the hat, performing more shows, etc, you should be able to make yourself attractive to show producers.

I’d also suggest taking the bold step of asking your producers what they offer on average for your type of act.   I was very fortunate in that one of the producers in my area was willing to give ranges for several types of acts based on how established and well-known they are. This gave me a realistic basis for developing my own rate.

I’ve been thinking about how much stuff I tote around when I work Faires - I’ve mentioned before that I’m a great believer in infrastructure - but when it comes down to it, there is an ABM - an Absolute Bare Minimum - that I’d want to pack in and out.

If you’re starting to work / perform at faires, don’t have a full “kit”, and are looking to get the most out of what little funds you have for this wacky pastime, here’s what I recommend:

• A washable blanket - something along the lines of a stadium blanket or even a piece of polar fleece in earth tones or neutrals. You can use this as seating, a wrap, or to hide those pesky modern things if opening parade hits and your stuff is still in plain view.
• A tarp - for under your blanket if you’re on damp or mushy ground, or over your gear backstage to keep the rain or other nature off it
• A plate, fork, spoon and knife - I went about this the usual way by hitting the local thrift shops, but you lucky kids today can just go to your local socially and environmentally aware grocery store and pick up “disposable” bamboo plates and eating utensils for a fraction of what us old guys used to spend.  And bamboo is a wood product so it’s as “period” as necessary.
• A beverage vessel - another good cause for hitting the local thrift or charity stores - pewter, brass, even stainless steel if it doesn’t look too modern. Wood is great, but you’ll need to look into sealing the inside.
• Trash bags - because humans generate garbage, and your tarp may not be big enough once you’ve got stuff spread out
• A small, soft-sided cooler - For your food (you are going to be frugal and bring at least some of what you’re going to consume at faire, aren’t you?)
• Something to carry it all in - preferably something with wheels if you can manage it. These days you can get a pretty nifty rolling shopping card / folding box on wheels for not too much, and you will appreciate the slight increase in expense at the end of a 3 day weekend when you have to haul your gear alllll the way out to performer parking. Way… out… there.

Of course, there’s also your costume and other props, so you should factor that stuff into the capacity of your carrying thingy.   The good news is that everything I’ve mentioned can be bought “off the shelf” at thrift and sporting supply shops… or if you’re willing to spend a little more time, you can spend less money and get the raw bits and do some sewing and sawing to make a custom ABM kit.